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Question to the expert: “I do not like to listen to audiobooks”

Why every evening the child asks to read the same fairy tale for him? And when you offer him something new, he refuses? The psychologist Anna Skavitina answers.

“I really like to listen to children’s fairy tales on disks, which I know by heart. And my parents make me listen to long audiobooks. There everyone reads in one voice, but I don’t like it!”

Anna Skavitina, Children’s Analyst:

“Small children adore when adults read the same fairy tales to them, pronounce everything the same and the same words. They look at the same pictures, listen to the same music – it soothes them. And adults, when they hear something familiar, understandable, feel that the world is in its place. From this feeling it also becomes calm. Lenya, although you are no longer small, but when you stay at home and at the same time something worries you, you also want to calm down. And then you use a very good way you are used to, you listen to familiar fairy tales on the disk. When you listen to a radio show where several votes sound, you have a feeling that you are not alone, but with other people. And if at such moments you listen to an audiobook, there is a feeling of monotony, as if there is some kind of robot next to you. And it may seem that you are left alone with yourself.

And you also know the saying – “Fairy Tale, but in it a hint is a lesson for good fellows”? We listen to our favorite stories not only because they reassure us. But even in order to try to find an answer for myself https://meekoanalytics.com/aviator-prediction-engana-apk-preveja-o-software-de-instalacao-do-aviador/ – should I act like the heroes of a fairy tale, or I would have acted differently? Do I have to observe these rules in my life? So you listen to these fairy tales and in order to understand what choice, what to do correctly. It seems that this is exactly what you need now. So tell mom: “Now I need just that. But someday I will listen to everything else “. And I hope mom will hear you “.

Mother’s image: how does he affect the daughter?

The formation of a woman is impossible without a mother figure. Whatever happens, there is always a female image with which the girl understands what it is – to be a woman. Since I was born a girl, what follows from this. And it follows very different, sometimes the opposite. Depending on what relations between the mother and daughter, the foundations of femininity will be laid down.

Let’s talk about mothers. We have identified several brightest types of mothers and the features of education, which they apply to their daughters. Of course, these models can be expressed in a more or less strong degree. Most often, styles are combined.

Infantile mother

Excessively emotional mother, with immature manifestations in life. A woman who was never able to take an adult position in life, enjoying her weakness and unstable for those around him to solve her problems.

In communication with her daughter, he constantly seeks to be a “girlfriend”, perhaps even buys the same clothes. Cannot build in relations with the daughter of the necessary framework: the child finds himself in a situation where he himself has to take the position of an adult.

Often their daughters talk about what such a mother had to blush repeatedly, and the whole life of an adult daughter is devoted to solving the problems of an infantile mother. If such a family does not have a strong figure of a father-the absent father or father-major-as the role of an adult, the daughter will take on the male role.

For daughters of infantile mothers, sexuality is usually the territory of big questions and difficulties. They have to create an image of femininity and adult sexuality in pieces that they find in the path of formation – through the images of women in the cinema, through other women surrounded. Their sexuality can be infantile – they expect their sensuality from a partner, rarely showing the initiative.

The movement to harmonize femininity will lie through the adoption of an adult woman, through the understanding of the concept of “strength” in a woman. Particular attention will be required to build borders in relations with such a mother, because she can strive for excessive merger and constant participation in her daughter’s life.

Prohibiting

Such a mother orders her daughter (direct or indirectly) to abandon sexuality. Cruelty can be expressed through words or actions. Often such women are not satisfied with their sexual life, and if the father lives in the family or takes part in the upbringing of her daughter, his mother extremely negatively responds about him and seeks to persuade her daughter to her side.

Giving birth in a daughter aversion to men and fear of other women, this mother puts a child before a choice: to

obey or rebel.